Author: obeedawalrus

Valentines/Holiday Commentary

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I feel tempted present things that would ruin the forced romantic valentines mood, but that wouldn’t be right

The only reason we value holidays is because most of us have have average and boring lives

So the one day it’s okay to say “let’s fuck!” reinforces that today is just another day, for some reason it is special

We should fuck everyday and not let valentines be another excuse to spend additional money that our partners take anyway

And don’t get me wrong with that first stanza

I love my partner and take care of her to the best of my ability

But I don’t see the world the way most people do

I’m lucky to live on this fucking planet and feel like that needs to be embraced by everyone

So I make the most of every day because my days were almost gone too many times to count

And that’s the reason I live everyday like I don’t have another one

We’re too caught up in the daily motions and lose ourselves in the moment, but we’re not Eminem trying to motivate people to get a big break.

I’m just a poet trying to get my head straight

I’m down for making a bed shake and maybe cause a minor earthquake but not making a big mistake

Don’t waste your time on Valentines because that is only one day

If 24 hours or whatever the combined or whatever amount of time we wish we had that we didn’t feel bad is short then cool

I wish you the best luck

And to the rest I world I never have and don’t plan to give a fuck

Work too hard and make your life miserable

Settle into making the distance valuable and people or things move too far away

Reality is a bitch and makes everything suck

I may live in the clouds but don’t believe in a fantasy world where set periods of time throughout the year are enough to keep people happy

Fuck holidays and live everyday like it is one, you’ll have a better life

Fuck Your Box, Bitch

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I’d love to have a tight and wet box to fuck but that won’t happen writing this shit

Like that I feel sometimes it is too restrictive

And it isn’t about what you can do inside the box, but instead about how hard it is to actually fit anything inside there

There’s a finite amount of space, and if you want to increase the capacity of what it can take..

Well you have to go down and get to work

Some need more work than others, but you always have to work

To get to the box you have to deal with the conditions it is packed

And its packed with is often times a lot more than what anyone wants

Probably anyone with the box is too focused on what else is going on because everything seems to be full

It’s a damn shame that some things are too full

A simple release is all that we need to understand exactly where we’re all going

If we collectively keep filling things up then we’ll be too heavy

Too heavy and we can’t move

We can’t moe and we stagnate

Stangnation isn’t great

But stagnation is our current state because we’re weighing ourselves down

Let someone fuck your box because you’ll unpack a lot of things from the past that in the current time don’t actually matter

Play safe

Don’t Know When I’ll be Back…

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I feel like it is appropriate to explain why I need to take a break from posting on this blog.

The major source of inspiration for my poems is everything that is wrong with this world.  I can only have so much of that enter and leave my mind in a given period of time. Recently I’ve been going through the final and worst stages of my split from my now ex.  It means there’s a lot of words to choose and rhyme patterns to glue them together but not enough to keep my emotional state stable.

There isn’t a large group of people who read this, but there are some.  And I feel like it is better to avoid leaving people in the dark if for a week or maybe longer than that I don’t post anything new.

I really enjoy writing, don’t get me wrong, but it takes a lot out of me mentally.  Revisiting the negative times in my life is very painful. And that pain is only made worse by my current situation.

Sympathy won’t help me, and I don’t want it.  I don’t need it.

Sorry to the people who like reading what I write if anyone looks forward to new configurations of words from me.

When I post again it’ll be when things are better.

– Niko

Sweet Talk the Princess

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She seems so sweet

What you want isn’t sweet but you pretend it is

She’s so hard to approach because you fear rejection

But rejection is just the projection of her pride because all she wants to do is protect herself

So don’t approach the princess

Don’t sweet talk the princess

She may be better on her back and definitely look better undressed, but remembershe’s guarding herself

And she may not want anybody else

She’s not happy with with herself

She will be a cunt to keep people away or test you

Fuck tests because passing them only meant that the monotenous material was memorized

She goes through the same process eveyr time because she doesn’t understand anything about anything

And she doesn’t have dreams

She thinks she has dreams

And the only reason the existence of a dream can be justified is because everything around her is going wrong

Don’t pretend like she’s the one if she doesn’t even count as one

Sometimes you shouldn’t sweet talk the princess

She hasn’t stepped out of her father’s shadow

Lowest Point Yet

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The living can never be truly sorry

Our wordly connections and values that ground us to this rock meant too much

Nothing is right until we have it our way, but that is the major fault within our anatomy

We exist to breed yet resist the urge

We preach controlling ourselves yet want to let go of our restraints at every opportunity

We cling to people who are escapes from the false realities we create to feel adequate when hte rest of the world tears us down

Those are the reasons we can never be sorry

Waking up is difficult, and we pray for nights to come

I pray for darkness to come for me so I can escape this horrible place called earth

I hope I leave something behind

But I doubt that I will in the future do anything of value

I hate this world

I’m sorry I was born

The world has be as a burden

Kind of Lost

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I like to convince myself that I’m lost

I had to restrucutre everything because it was only me

I had a lot of things going on but no one to give me real support

Half-assed “do your best” was not enough then

And that shit is not enough now

I’m glad I don’t have a connection with you anymore

I found motivation to move forward when you kept me in place

Like I told you before, you’re a loser

I wanted to win

I put myself on the path to winning

And I did that because I learned what it was like to experience life through the eyes of someone who can’t see

And you couldn’t see because you wanted to have slanted eyes

I wanted to see things burn, and to some degree still do

But things burning weren’t bad things like you thought

The things I knew burned, and from those ashes better things were made

Going forward isn’t a bad thing

I’m in a better place

And I made the goal to be in a better place because I wanted to be there

I stopped giving a fuck about what people who didn’t look out for me thought and made something of myself

I can try to convince myself that I’m lost but in reality I’m choosing where to go next

I’m Not Happy With You As A Person

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Your expectatations don’t mean a fucking thing

You gave it all up just to waste your time

I know your parents raised you to be a bitch

But it’s not your fault that they’re bitches

I would say “fuck you” but that’s already happened

I’d rather be between your thighs than deal with your problems and lack of motivation

It’s easy to say that you’re better off being penetrated and feeling connected than sitting alone and wishing the next opportunity comes your way

But you are comfortable with being alone, and prefer to be alone

That polar vortex was probably caused by you because you’re so cold

It’s a shame you’re like that

Stay in the back of the class and hate that you’re picked last

Or maybe you like being picked last

I don’t give a fuck

Bury yourself under unrealistic expectations and live in a fantasy world dominated by innocence

I don’t feel bad about taking yours

Small goals for a small minded girl are the perfect fit

A promotion to manager won’t make you

Nothing can break you, you already broke yourself

It’s you and no one else

Give yourself to the dirt when you pass and be a waste of space in a graveyard, bitch

First Actual Post

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I have to explain some things about this blog that are important for everyone who reads this to know. I have a very dark view of the world.  Writing is an escape from the world that in my eyes isn’t made for creative people. I feel like the world is made for people to follow trends and be pulled off the edge of the world if being a follower is the only route worth traveling.

What I write isn’t for everyone.  Between the vulgar language, disregard for what is deemed as appropriate by society, and breaking most of the silent rules we’re forced to accept there is a message.  And I may not have a regular schedule or space my posts out like I probably should if the goal is to grow this blog, but really want to at least know that my words can have an impact.

My words definitely aren’t pretty, but they hit home.  And if they hit home with someone, great. Maybe I was the voice that opened someone’s eyes to a new perspective.

If my words don’t hit home and they’re ignored… I’ll still be in the same place where I’ve always been and continue to create as my therapy.

To anyone who has read one of the poems I wrote so far I sincerely thank you.  Thank you to anyone who lets friends, family, or whoever know about my blog because it helps a lot.  As an artist it feels good to know that people are looking at what I write.

I hope you all get something from these poems!

– Niko

Whatever Tomorrow Brings Will Suck

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I’m inspired ot write poems like this by a dead guy

It’s odd that he rhymed for a living but after his death people use those same patterns to wish their lives would shorten or end

He was almost thirty and went too soon

R.Eye.P

He said “my worst habit is waking up at least once a day”

And he said a lot more about society, looking at it from a realistic perspective

To be honest I don’t want to see tomorrow,

But there’s nothing keeping me from seeing tomorrow,

So I wake up an repeat the same patterns over and over until my eventual end that hopefully comes sooner than later

I was always paranoid about going out at night or before the sun lit the world

I’m scared of that same thing now, but I was worried about vampires then

I would cover my neck with the sheets thinking that it would protect my neck

Like that would stop any vampire…

I believed a lot of crazy things as a kid

I also beleived that there was someone out there for me..

For people like me there is no one out there

Nowhere (I felt like rhyming some shit, so I just wrote this, it concidentally rhymed)

I’m too much, and not for the wrong reasons

I’m passionate when the rest of the world is okay being basic

I’m more than what one person can handle and what a village can tame with spears and sticks

Well nowadays people never handle their own problems so those sticks might as well be replaced with guns and lights backed up by blaring sirens that disrupt the sleep of nearby small children and other innocent beings

I don’t regret waking up in the morning

I want to make my day the best it can be.

But not everyday is the the best day

Tomorrow has the potential to be better

But tomorrow also has the potential to be black

The day ends black and the day starts black

Our lives start in darkness and end in the light

But somehow we all end up in the same darkness we came from

Life isn’t a circle

Life is a cliff where you walk off after a certain point and fall for infinity without a way to slow yourself down

Fuck life

I’m ashamed that I live it

Is The Rhythmic Element Here Impressive?

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Invisible rejection interjected into our realities by the silent infastructure of lies and insecurities that drive us beyond our means and let us pretend that we see is a dream

It is actually our really compacted into a set of simple ideas that someone else thought would be good to package as alternatives to our current way of thinking

Nothing is less interesting that the lack of substance in a world that claims to contain so much

Places, people, and things is all we have

And we have more if you count everything out of frustration, anger or any other negative emotion that we painted in black

We painted love in black, and it will never be the same

Passion pushes people apart and the ashes of what was dance in the flames

Isn’t that why we feel like we got burned?

Or was our passion too much to handle?

Were we not enough? No

The other person was not good enough

And they gave you no actual reason to give a fuck

I agree with the guy who said “empathy is the poor man’s cocaine, and love is just a chemical by any other name” on a song called Burn Fetish

He can’t be burned anymore because he’s dead